(Female First Name) (Female Surname) (PM No) Prime Minister
(Lives In) woman sweeps into No. 10
By (Written By) Chief Political Correspondent
Number 10 Downing Street changed hands yet again last night as a new Prime Minister swept to power in what pundits said was the biggest landslide since the BBC invented the Swingometer. Westminster insiders were in turmoil as safe seat after safe seat fell, catapulting (Female First Name) (Female Surname) to power - and world leaders wondering – “just who is this (Lives In) woman”, and “what does her election mean for the rest of the world?”
(Female First Name) left her constituency as the first results began to come in at 1.30 a.m., and was headed for party HQ in central London in a chauffeured limousine. Supporters up and down the country were ecstatic and by 3 a.m., political insiders were describing it as an ‘unstoppable wave’. It appears that (Previous PM)’s wife was right to have left the family bags in the hallway of Number 10.
At a party gala in London, Robbie Williams played the anthem of the campaign, 'Things Can Only Get Even Better' to loud cheers from the crowd. Party members cheered and tears were visible on the faces of loyal supporters.
“I would just like to say a big thank you to Britain for supporting me,” said the new Prime Minister as she arrived in the early hours of the morning. “You will not regret it!”
Political pundits speculated that, with a list of policies which included a three-day weekend and five extra Bank Holidays a year, it was likely Britain would indeed remain behind Prime Minister (Female Surname) for a very long time to come.
As the new Prime Minister was whisked from party headquarters towards Downing Street, messages from all around the world had begun to pour in. The US President sent a typically eloquent note, saying, “(Female First Name) this is your moment. This is your time. Together we can change the world!”
And as the door of Number 10 slammed shut behind the new incumbent the pack of experienced political journalists outside swore they heard the pop of champagne corks and clinking of glasses from within - a busy schedule already awaiting Britain's new PM.
At 10 a.m. a helicopter was waiting to take Prime Minister (Female Surname) to meet the Queen at Balmoral. Party spin doctors would not comment, however, that a diversion was expected – rumours have it that the new PM will be celebrating her appointment at her local pub with friends and family, before her onward trip to Scotland.