I'm A Celebrity... Newspaper Spoof Female

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She’s beautiful, courageous and smarter than she makes out; she’s the one they were all talking about on Day One of I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here.

She’s wriggled her way through the Bushtucker Trial and gulped down maggots, mealworms and cockroaches like they were chocolate fudge cake, but that doesn’t stop her smiling.

“I’ve given maggot medley, cockroach crunch and snake soup a fair try, but I definitely prefer a good old-fashioned cooked breakfast,” said (Female First Name).

Family members say (Age)-year old (Female First Name) (Female Surname) from (Lives In) is terrified of everything, but has conquered her biggest fears as she was forced to endure a chain of grisly jungle trials. From tackling the hill of hell to swimming through a crocodile-infested swamp, (Female First Name) fearlessly accomplished the tasks and won her fellow celebrities some extra rations.

Subjected to public scrutiny a million miles from her comfort zone, (First Name) has remained surprisingly sane on the camp as kind-hearted TV viewing voters have had fun inflicting whatever sort of ritualistic public humiliation they saw fit to bestow upon the only one-time unknown. Other winners for the UK TV show included Kerry Katona, Joe Pasquale and Gina D’Acampo, but does (Female First Name) have what it takes to be crowned Queen of the Jungle? 

Similarly to Tara Palmer-Tomkinson in series one, (Female First Name) was lucky enough to share a shower that literally covered her in hundreds of bugs, but (Female First Name) clearly has the wow factor with voters across the UK.

Despite dining out on bowls of mill worms, cockroaches and fishes, having her head placed in a watertight tank filled with water and eels, (Female First Name) handled the trials and tribulations with bravado saying:

“I’ll have a crack. I’ll just make sure I wear waterproof mascara.”